What I’ve Learned in The Last Two Weeks, and Other Tales from Hiatus (or Come Here, All Ye Ron Paul Faithful)

Well, finally, I’m back, being provocative, controversial, unread, etc., etc. after a two week break. I hope you all enjoyed it. I experienced a lot I could have used for the blog during the past two weeks, and most of it actually wasn’t about Islam, which I doubt I’ll be writing about again for a short time, you’d be surprised how scarce sources are. I’ll recap for you:

 JetBlue is being stupid. They’re sponsoring the DailyKos convention, which even Hell Inc. has declined to to sponsor. CEO Beelzebub had this to say to reporters after being spotted leaving his Inner Ring, 7th Circle office: “It’s scary, what those guys are trying to do. Hillary’s [Hillary Clinton] offered us some real competition, and Satan has had to work hard to keep his title as Prince of Darkness, so this is the last thing we need on top of that. We don’t want people coming in here talking about what an improvement it is after the Global Socialist Union.”

And yet, JetBlue has decided to sponsor them. I saw it on O’Reilly, they had a bunch of stuff out of MoveOn: “The pope is a primate,” “Better luck next time” in the Dick Cheney terrorist attempted assasination, “Maybe it would be better if Tony Snow were dead” after his announcement that he had cancer, a bunch of stuff like that. What really annoyed me, though, was that the CEO that the Fox reporter caught up with and completely destroyed wasn’t wearing any sort of suit. Nothing. You’re a CEO of major airline, buy a suit for God’s sake. And also, in the same O’Reilly factor, Bill made a very articulate statement that I think we should all follow: “You don’t put your kids in a pool with a killer.”

Ron Paul is an idiot. I already knew this, but I was further reassured by this, via criminyjicket. In October of 2006, Ron wrote this boring article. I don’t care about how highways are destroying our freedom, myself, but it does make for an interesting double standard. If you dig through this garbage, I guess you find that he’s trying to appropriate funds for the same NAFTA superhighway to extend it through Texas he was talking about in the article, I-69, just months after writing the article.

Ron Paul is an idiot, again, yeah. Look at what he’s decided now. Mr., sorry, Dr. Paul says that we’re in danger of blah blah blah after being asked about a statement by Cindy Sheehan where she said something about the Bush administration perpetrating a terrorist attack. Now, he never actually said anything about the staged terrorist attacks, but he did seem to agree with them to me and added on in a friendly way. He said that Bush was blaming Iran for everything in Iraq as well. Wait until he says Bush is blaming al-Qaida for everything, that’ll be fun.

 

SHOCKED RONPAUL SEZ 

I IZNT IDIOT!

Ron Paul’s genetic makeup is an idiot. Never mind the guy himself. Now it’s what he looks like that’s getting him into trouble. This comes via Braden’s Take On the Matter.:

Ron Paul Is Magneto.

Something is going on with Michael Moore and CNN. I’m too lazy to dig into anything about lefty vs. lefty-er like this so I have no idea what’s going on at all, but here’s a piece of advice to Mrs. Moore: if CNN is criticizing you for your accuracy in filming a movie about health care from a leftist point of view, you’ve gone too far. You are at least a garden variety Stalinist.

Oh yeah, and if you needed any more reasons to not watch Oprah, now she’s throwing her full weight behind Barack which isn’t saying a lot because it’s liable to change drastically every other day.

Wait, I forgot again… what was it? Oh, yeah, Harry Potter spoiler people. Stop. Now. That’s right. As a fan (yes, it’s completely true, I am a fan of Harry Potter) I don’t need this stuff days before the final book comes out, I really don’t. They were supposed to have security. I guess you just can’t trust anyone with an advanced copy anymore.

Firefighters are For Fred! Which has a very nice ring, unlike Firefighters for Rudy. For other Fred news, check out the Fred ‘08 with new Fred News Aggregate, FredTube, Breaking Fred News features as well as Fred OnTheIssues and I’m With Fred Blog links a Fredload of Fredfilled logos and of course, home of my new “Fred Can Haz Ur Vote?” campaign.

OH HAI RUDY! 

 

I’M JUST IN UR CITYZ, STEALIN UR VOTEZ

**I do hope you like the new  lolpoltishunz idea I had. I don’t have or want photoshop, so you’re stuck with simple captions for now.

This blog is dedicated to the memory of I can has Cheezburger. CNN Political Ticker has recently replaced them as top blog. You will always be number one purveyor of nonsense in our hearts, ICHC, despite the fact that CNN makes you seem articulate.